Still inclined, still not there, still hopeful, still motivated, but still behind. Lack of motivation is a bad habit and not something I am aiming for. But hopeful to achieve by remaining positive and picking up where I left of. To find the ability to realise what has worked and hasn’t. And taking the next step from there.

Quite some years ago this lack of motivation, this horrible bad habit, has been taunting me and provoking stress. It’s been causing negativity in my mind, lack of energy in my body, and sleepless nights. Fighting it all with the tools at my disposal I’ve been able to catch up, stay ahead, and come to the point where I am now. I recognise the difference.

To address this bad habit where it is now, I will have to aim higher, make the reward bigger, and find the incentive to achieve that end-goal of long-term effect.

The questions I’ve been asking myself as to how I picked this up along the road are along the lines of: How far back does this go? Why do I need this, and why did I not recognise it sooner? How bad do I want to get rid of it? And what are my benefits when I do?

The answers are a bit personal, but it goes back quite a bit, and maybe I did recognise it but kind of ignored it for the longest time possible. And I want to slowly work on getting rid of it, and the benefits are perhaps even life changing. Who knows, maybe even more than I currently perceive. Hopefully time will tell, with a positive outcome.

Hey, don’t underestimate lack of motivation. The inability to not take the time to just do a few things can have long-term consequences. And just being able to be motivated over the littlest things can have a great positive impact as to how you go through a day, and how you finish one. Fighting stress in life is more important than some people might think.

As with everything I try to change in my life I try to have a plan of action. Okay, maybe somewhat unofficial, but at the least I have thought about it, and that helps me get direction. I like to slowly build up, just like with fitness, or a diet, and pick up something and do it. And I don’t mean throwing the trash out and completing an item on my to-do list. I mean the things that are on my mind that cause stress and negativity to build up. If it takes a few days, perhaps a few weeks. That is ok. Once it’s behind me, it will be a bit of weight that will be lifted and I might just be motivated to keep that up.

And yes, I understand the need to change. Life’s moving forward, and not having the motivation to go at the same speed means I end up with regret, and the knowledge I could have been in a happier place “if only”. How do I not see I have to take action now, right?

Finally, just as with product development, it’s important to be specific. My to-do app is slowly building up a list that also acts as a reminder. Not to remind me once in a while to take action. But to help me refresh my thoughts about all of this, again, to give me direction.

Let’s persevere.